Updated: 16 May 2007
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In June 2000 I attended a Radical Forgiveness workshop conducted by Colin Tipping at the Relaxation Centre in Brisbane. The workshop was based Tipping's book, 'Radical Forgiveness'. Below are a few random notes I made at the time about the workshop. Although these notes were made for myself, I have decided to post them online in an unedited format as an introduction for others into Radical Forgiveness.
Colin Tipping's Radical Forgiveness techniques had a powerful (and positive) effect on me personally and I recommend the technique to anyone seeking to heal the shadow aspects of their psyche and rebuild their relationships with others. For a thorough understanding of the technique it is recommended you obtain and read a copy of Tipping's book 'Radical Forgiveness'.
Alex Paterson (2000)
Radical Forgiveness is an extension of the primary truth underlying all reality, namely that everything in the Universe is an expression of a Singularity which I choose to call Source and most others call God. As such, everything in the Universe is interconnected.
Radical Forgiveness is based upon the simple premise that the 'dark' or shadow aspects of our psyche which we need to acknowledge and heal are reflected for us in those who have significant impact on our lives - be they lovers, spouse, work colleagues, children, parents, friends, mentors or so called enemies. As Tipping quite rightly pointed out: "if you spot it (a behaviour trait) in others, then you have got it. (yourself)."
The key word in the above statement is 'acknowledge'. Whenever we try to deny something we don't like by pretending it does not exist within us, we invalidate it. To invalidate means "to render having no effect", but the great irony is that as soon as we attempt to invalidate something it immediately demands attention to be validated. The reason for this is simple. Invalidation by definition is an attempt to separate out that which one wishes to invalidate from those aspects we choose to acknowledge. From the perspective of the essential 'ONENESS' pervading the Universe, separation is an illusory 'artificial' state requiring a huge amount of energy to maintain. When we suppress something by invalidating it, we think the issue has gone away, but this is a delusion because the issue will inevitably reappear at some stage to be acknowledged and validated and this process cannot be avoided. Invalidation is a bit like trying to stop the flow of a stream; it can be achieved for a little while, but eventually the weight of water builds up and overwhelms us and continues to flow in accordance with the natural law of balance.
The following definitions are important and need to be clearly understood.
At our essence we are energy expressed as LOVE and love expresses itself as an urge towards Unity and harmony.
When two people meet and are attracted to each other, energy (which is love) begins to flow between them and they experience the emotion of fraternity and in some cases, falling in love. Initially, this flow is unrestricted because the people involved do not judge each other, but with the passage of time one or both of them invariably begin to apply judgement about the other person. As defined above, judgement is a form of discernment in which our Ego consciousness applies 'value' or 'merit' to the different aspects of the thing we are discerning. However, this thinking is fatally flawed as everything in the Universe is a manifestation of SOURCE and despite the perception of separation that is fundamental to experience in this realm (i.e. the Physical Universe ), nothing is ever really separate from anything else and as such everything is of equal validity and value. The moment the Ego assigns value to something over and above something else by judging it, it invalidates all the aspects of so called 'lesser' value which creates disharmony (dis-harmony) resulting in an energy blockage. Thus, instead of the energy flowing freely between two people in a relationship, it begins to spiral back in on itself in order to heal the disharmony. This process manifests itself as emotions of fear, distrust and separation. It is from the perception of separation that we then create our victim stories in which we allege the other person or persons "did something to us". The truth of course, is that we manifested the whole process in co-operation with the soul (or souls) of the other people involved in the drama for the purpose of healing the shadow aspects of our psyche, which have been mirrored by the others involved in the drama for us. (more on this later)
At its essence, Radical Forgiveness is about reminding ourselves that we are not really separate from our Source (God), and as such we are entirely responsible for the circumstances we find ourselves in. It is from the perspective of this universal truth that our ego 'victim stories' are revealed to be the nonsense that they really are, and once reminded of this 'truth', the victim story then collapses.
Colin Tipping's Radical Forgiveness healing technique is elegantly simple.
Universe is a manifestation of the consciousness of a single infinite
entity we call God. The scientific evidence in support of this
concept is actually overwhelming at a Quantum Physics level. In fact,
at a Quantum Physics level there is no evidence in support of
the Universe comprising separate 'bits' of matter - all the evidence
to date points to the Universe comprising a single unified field of
energy. The manifestation of God in the Physical Universe is
consciousness in the form of energy. Physical matter is just 'slowed
down' energy. Emotions are a form of Energy we store in our bodies.
(We have many 'bodies' or levels of being, the densest being our
For more on this subject see:
are spiritual beings having a physical incarnation in this realm for
the purpose of experiencing emotions, especially those emotions
associated with the perception of separation and re-connection.
Apparently, the emotions we experience in this realm have no real
counterpart anywhere else in creation and as such souls are queuing
up to experience this realm, despite the misery, pain and heaviness
that is part and parcel of experience in this realm at the present
NOTE: There is no such thing as 'time', just an eternal 'now'. (a paradox)
We come into this realm forgetting who we really are (i.e. that we are individualised, but inseparable aspects of Source) to add realism and excitement to the perception of separation associated with this realm. Unfortunately, it would appear that the 'virtual reality' that is this realm has become so 'real' to most humans they have become lost in it. Thus, most humans no longer have any clue as to their true nature - that they are an inseparable aspects of Source - and perceive themselves to be truly separate and cast out by God. (e.g. Christianity) Many humans are so lost in the 'game' they are no longer even aware of the existence of Source. (e.g. Western culture)
We invoke everything that happens to us in this realm. There are always reasons for the circumstances we find ourselves in, meaning there are no such things as 'accidents', and those reasons are associated with our spiritual growth. We do not need to consciously know exactly why we have invoked the circumstances we find ourselves in - the reasons will reveal themselves at the proper time - we just need to remember and accept that we are the authors of our story and get on with it. Most humans don't understand or accept any of these truths, which why there is so much pain and suffering in the world at the moment.
This realm would appear to be very rare in that those souls partaking of it have free will, and that within the rules of the 'game', anything goes. Souls in this realm are the 'thrill seekers' of creation so to speak who have volunteered to experience this realm for that reason. By definition GOD is perfection and as such the Universe always remains in a perfect state of 'balance'. One of the immutable rules of the game in this realm is that any imbalance we create associated with our perception of separation must be re-balanced, via a process known as 'Karma'.
Our EGO is the everyday consciousness we are aware of within this realm associated with our 'present' incarnation. As mentioned earlier, our Ego consciousness is by necessity of limited awareness as to its real identity (i.e. that it is an individualised, but inseparable aspect of God) for the purpose of adding realism and a sense of adventure to those partaking of experience in this realm. Our Ego would appear to be an amalgam of some aspects of other incarnations we have chosen to bring with us into our 'current' incarnation, characteristics of the genetics (DNA) associated with the body we have chosen to incarnate in, and our experiences within this realm (i.e. our upbringing and life experiences in the present incarnation). On the other hand the psyche (soul) of most humans remains relatively unconscious to our waking 'ego' consciousness in this realm, but whispers to us through our emotions, gut feelings and our conscience. (e.g. the Soul is the 'voice' that whispers to us "I shouldn't have done that") Spiritual awakening is all about getting in touch with our Soul (i.e. our Higher Self) from within this realm and allowing it into our waking everyday consciousness. Whilst the physical brain is the store house of information for our Ego mind to operate with in this realm, that information (and our ego consciousness) survives physical death as anyone who has had a near death experience can attest.
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Because we have free will, our Soul (the God essence of our Being that always remains consciously connected to SOURCE) does not directly interfere with the decisions made by our Ego consciousness. Because of this 'rule' the GAME is structured such that we attract into our physical lives those who display (mirror) the 'shadow' aspects of ourselves we wish to heal (transmute). As Colin Tipping quite rightly quipped; "if you spot it (in others) you've got it" (meaning if we become upset by something another human being does or displays, then we can rest assured that that is a shadow aspect of our psyche we have come into this realm to heal)
This realm is really just a dream so to speak. (the ultimate virtual reality) From time to time we are given glimpses of our true essence via spiritual experiences from within this realm for the purpose of keeping us going. In other words, the veil is pulled aside slightly from time to time so we don't completely lose sight of our essence. (I consider my experiences of the Void and NDE as examples of this sort of thing. AP)
are all co-creating the virtual reality that is the Physical
Universe. The 'I' that is 'we' (i.e. Spirit) has designed the dream to be so realistic that we
must experience what we have put in place. The 'Game' itself never
stops, (time itself is an illusion) but once we understand the game
and the rules (which we are all co-creating) we can move through it
with levity and fun.
NOTE: The dream will eventually end when 'everyone' wakes up and chooses to return home to the oneness with God that is our true state of being.
Because human souls have free will, there is no compulsion on humans to wake up as to their true identity and move on. However, it would appear that the souls involved in this realm eventually get sick and tired of the pain, suffering and heaviness associated with the karmic debt incurred whilst playing the 'game' and then experience an urge to progress beyond this realm towards a conscious reconnection with their essence (GOD). (I consider myself in this category. Alex Paterson 2000)
From the human perspective within this realm practically everything is wrong in the world at the moment, with evil occurring everywhere. (e.g. there are at least 40 wars occurring at this very moment, along with a level of environmental degradation that threatens our very existence on Earth etc.) However, from the perspective of spirit everything is perfect and nothing 'bad' is really happening; just the unfolding of a divine plan (game) in which each and everyone of us eventually wake up to our true identity.
A couple of weeks after this workshop I met a man in a bookshop. He made two (2) statements which cut to the essence of 'Radical Forgiveness'.
Copyright © Alex Paterson 1999
A Radical Forgiveness worksheet can be downloaded and printed from here.
MASTER INDEX of articles written, posted online or recommended by Alex Paterson
Colin Tipping's Radical Forgiveness Website
Alex PATERSON is an Australian citizen by birth. He writes articles and advises on issues pertaining to aviation, politics, sociology, the environment, sustainable farming, history, computers, natural health therapies, esoteric teachings and spirituality.
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